Designer: manikka
Resources: 1 2 3 4 5 6

"waterfall running down my neck."

i just feel worst after finding out.




damn.
stop acting as if i'm SUPPOSED to be there for everybody lah can?! i mean, okay. so i'm supposed to be there for all my "best friends" and shits. but my MUM needs me the most right now okay? and i'm stuck in between. i have my limits too okay?! i need time with MYSELF too. i need time with my OTHER girlfriends. i need time with my FAMILY. i need time with BABY. and mum thinks i can't handle my time-management and i cried and cried and cried at secret recipe just now just because of her lecture.


i hate/detest/dislike it the way people act as though they're the only ones suffering from problems and dilemmas or whatever-not. i mean, hello? take a look at the world? other people are suffering from problems much worse than yours? sheeeeesh. and it's even WORST when those people breakdown and cry because of problems that they CREATED THEMSELVES. ughs.



i mean, "knaper gatal sangat kan?"
typical humans la kann?
they go looking for trouble when they're trouble-free.
and they assume without asking.
i fucking HATE people who ASSUME.
even if you're my bestbestbest friend or even my boyfriend.
i fucking HATE this characteristic. ughs.
and when you make stupid decisions.
you cry and cry and cry.

sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesh.


even if baby does this.
i won't pity him. seriously.
i'll just blog something similar to this.
and only expect him to wake up on his own.

IT'S YOUR LIFE. we are the people who make decisions in our lives. i mean, who can force us to wake up except ourselves kan? and what's the point of me advising you over and over again when you act as though you've heard the same advise a million times over and you just keep doing the same mistakes again and again?



and kan. i hate it when people talk as though everything is MY FAULT. like, everything i do leads to a negative effect. i mean, yeah, you have the right to shout at me. but do you even know the reason for my tears just now? you don't. and how do you try to find out? by shouting at me. i mean, sure, go ahead. i don't care. they're just people living lives too. but the thing that hurt me the most was the way you acted as though EVERYTHING was because of me.

i mean, seriously. take a fucking mirror and look at your reflection first. i hate it when people try to get sympathy in front of a lot of people. it's basic human psychology, yeah, even i do it at times, yeah, but it gets really fucked up when it becomes a HABIT. ugh.



and i hate overly-pampered people.
i'm pampered, yes.
but i'm definitely not overly-pampered.
i hate these scenarios.

girl: woo.. baby, i want that skirt..
boy: ouh.. okay baby.. i'll try to get it for you..
girl: no baby.. i really really want it..
boy: but i have no cash with me now dear..
girl: i don't care. withdraw some money for me.. i want that skirt now!
boy: *sadly withdraws money to buy skirt*

why?

because the boy wants to make the girl happy. and the girl takes advantage. ugh. seriously la eh. WAKE UP LAH. there are times to joke and laugh. and there are definitely times to be serious. you have to learn to be the latter.



whatever you think la eh.
anyhoo. i'm still here for you.
but FUCK YOU.
i'm NOT going to be at your BECK AND CALL.





and i cried again and again thinking about what she said. as sayang was holding my hands under the table. as i closed my eyes, trying hard to swallow my tears.


i just feel like running away with baby.
it's as though nobody understands me anymore.
nobody else except him.

goodbye.