Designer: manikka
Resources: 1 2 3 4 5 6

"wonder what's wrong with me."

i strongly recommend that you stop any song playing right now, and play this song here. =) it's specially for today's entry.




lithium

lithium.. don't want to lock me up inside
lithium.. don't wanna forget how it feels without
lithium.. i wanna stay in love with my sorrow
oh... but God, i wanna let it go

come to bed, don't make me sleep alone
couldn't hide the emptiness, you let it show
never wanted it to be so cold
just didn't drink enough to say you love me

i can't hold on to me
wonder what's wrong with me

lithium.. don't wanna lock me up inside
lithium.. don't wanna forget how it feels without
lithium.. i wanna stay in love with my sorrow
ohh....

don't want to let it lay me down this time
drown my will to fly
here in the darkness i know myself
can't break free until i let it go
let me go...

darling, i forgive you after all
anything is better than to be alone
and in the end i guess i had to fall
always find my place among the ashes

i can't hold on to me
wonder what's wrong with me

lithium.. don't wanna lock me up inside
lithium.. don't wanna forget how it feels without
lithium... stay in love with my sorrow
ohh... i'm gonna let it go

~ evanescence



how do you let somebody know that things aren't the way it seems..? dammit.

14/40.
22/40.
it's an increase of 8 marks. that's a 20% increase. [i think.] ahaha. i'll try my best to increase it another 8 more marks. =) wish me luck. the failing stops now. =D

anyhoo.


it scares shareefah when she:
cries til her hazel eyes aren't visible anymore. [eeek.]
cries til her eyes get blood-shot red. [double eeek.]
cries even with closed eyes; like when she's sleeping.
attempts suicide without knowing it.
smiles like nothing's wrong; to pretend to be happy.
breaks down and bangs her head against the wall.
looks at him and sees him smiling.
coughs non-stop til blood comes out.
concludes that she'll never believe in love again.
is trapped in darkness; alone.



randomness.




i'm losing hope in everything i do. and the feeling sucks. i talked to yohannis and jummy about it. i just have to keep strong. nobody else should know. nobody else would know. and please, don't act as though you know me inside-out and start making wild guesses. it makes me sick to the stomach when you do that. bitch.

*ahemahem*

i'm not like you.
not all my problems are due to "fucked-up love".
fuck, i don't even have a love-life anymore. hah!
i'm effing sick of all you fucking spoilt-brats who're living.
you don't deserve to be living your bloody lives.
so what if i'm going to keep torturing myself?
who the hell do you think you are to judge my actions when you know SHIT about me?!
so you know what you should do?
just shut the fuckingbloodyshitting hell up.
thank you, asshole.
wheee~ =DD


nyehaha.
somehow, i just needed to type those words to let off some steam. nope, it's not to the tagger ["Gentleman"] who tagged me. nor is it to anybody you THINK it is. cause i didn't tell anybody about this entry. and if you act as if you know and begin to spread rumours, or terase, or get any wrong ideas... well, then you're such a f-tard. =)


and i hope you burn in hell.
heh. xP

valentine's day equals to.
7 roses.
7 chocolates.
a kiss? ha-ha. xP

a big thank you to everybody who gave me gifts. i love every single one of you! and jia le! we still have that deal on for next year, ya? xP

hmm.
goodbye.

p/s: i have a note to that somebody who's been acting as if i belong to you. *ahemahem* to that PERSON, please, back off. yes. you are very irritating. what's up with the many phone calls at night when I AM ALREADY ASLEEP or those question-smses which always asks me about my whereabouts? please, shut up already. thank you. blahs.